Here's What You Need to Be a LEADER

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More nuggets coming up about personal leadership! I've got a lot to share with you on the topic, and how embracing it can change your life and career!

Bisous x

"I Don't Know" - What it Really Means

"I don't know"...Harmless enough response to a question, isn't it? Perhaps you use it quite frequently.

This is just a quick post to highlight what I am finding in working with my clients.

I find that the ways the response "I don't know" is most often used is not in the circumstance where somebody truly does not know the answer to the question, but in one of several other situations, such as:

  • Facing Fear: "I feel resistance to thinking about this - it may identify a fear I have that I'm not willing to face;"
  • Time versus Priority: "This is not really a priority for me to think about so let's move on;"
  • Solve My Problems: "This feels like it will take a lot of energy to think about - I want you to do it for me;"
  • Processing: "I need to digest this - it's a big idea and I don't know what to do with it right now."

On rare occasions in my business, it means "I genuinely do not know the answer to that question, but I am going to find out."

Language helps to create our reality - what you say is what you ultimately do and how you show up. "I don't know" can be seen as avoidant behaviour, procrastination, lack of creativity or desire to solve a problem - and in some cases, just plain lazy! I believe that this 'no response' response creates our reality, too - it's the thoughts behind the non-committal and ambiguous words that matter.

Before you answer "I don't know", try digging deeper - if "I don't know" wasn't a phrase, what would your response be?

Get to the real answer behind those words so you can gain greater understanding of the problem and greater self-awareness.

Want to create a different reality? Get on a call and let's see if we're a fit!

Why You Should Look In the Mirror More

Photo credit: Mark Solarski

Photo credit: Mark Solarski

Self-Awareness is the path to greatness

This has probably been said in one form or other by thousands of philosophers, self-proclaimed self-help gurus, and motivational speakers. It came to me as I lay in bed this morning contemplating...well, a lot.

I am trialling a new process that helps us to understand repeating behaviours and change these long-held beliefs and behavioural patterns. It's based on the premise that we get what we focus on, and if we focus on our 'story' - the thing we want to move away from, we simply perpetuate it and make it stronger.

I am not ready to endorse it or share it until I have truly seen the benefits, although I feel sure I will be shouting it from the rooftops shortly - I had a mind-blowing experience with it yesterday. It enriches my ability to offer exceptional coaching, by knowing myself more and having the same experience as a client, so I can be empathetic to others' needs and use the techniques with my clients.

This is what I'm finding, and perhaps it resonates with you.

The more I understand my thoughts, beliefs and behavioural patterns, the more I am able to take control and stand in my power so I can achieve all I desire. Self-awareness creates peace - a stronger place from which to work towards desires and goals than fear.

"So what?" I hear you say

"What has this to do with me and my life?"

It pains me when I see people who have never held the mirror up to see and know themselves better. It's not because I feel I know better; it is because I see their capacity for greatness they often don't see. Seeing our reflection allows us to reduce fear, increase our confidence, and create change in our lives to pursue and achieve business and career goals, improve personal relationships, find 'the one', become kinder, calmer, more 'together' people - whatever we desire as our greatness. Ultimately, we come to know, love and accept ourselves better.

This type of self-awareness and self-knowledge allow us to see our 'triggers' - the pain points that create fear and fury that prevent us from living as we truly desire - to be able to manage our way through them. They are seldom eliminated but they can be minimised to the point where the response is not acted upon or it is replaced with another more positive action.

Even more amazing is that by working with our triggers in this way, we can positively impact our physical health too. Imagine being free of the pain in that dodgy hip, shoulder, neck, back you've been harbouring for years! Frankly, that's enough to keep me going back for more! Physical pain has been said to most often be the physical manifestation of emotional pain and fear.

"Again,...what has this to do with me?"

The point of which is to say, this is the sort of stuff that comes out in coaching - challenging our existing beliefs and behavioural patterns that prevent us from achieving all we desire (whatever that may be.) It is powerful stuff and can create lasting, positive change in our lives - mental, physical, emotional - IF we choose it.

The only pre-requisite: It requires a desire and a conscious decision to honour yourself enough to want more for yourself (and your loved ones.)

Want to know yourself more?

Want to step into your own greatness?

Want to create lasting, positive change?