THAT was quite the week!
Not only did the unimaginable/unexpected happen with a reality TV star / mega-business magnate writing history by becoming US president elect over the first woman candidate writing her own, the high court in the UK recently ruled that Brexit requires approval from MPs, throwing already uncertain plans into more disarray. The week also ended on a very intense outpouring of raw emotion in another area of my life that kind of summed up the week.
Perhaps it has something to do with the planets (no idea), but everyone seems really raw. Feelings of lack of safety throughout their lives are demonstrated in outpourings of emotion, and social media is often the outlet. It seems the lack of control and uncertainty in our political, social and personal environments are really taking their toll on us all.
So how can we feel emotionally safe with all that's going on?
Not sure I have the magic pill but here is what I have found worked for me this week to bounce back and feel a degree of safety:
1. Reduce Your Exposure to Social Media.
Just don't. Step away from the flames.
If ever there was fuel for the flames, this medium is it - and of course, you know that. It is good and evil all at once, and seemingly benign comments can quickly be escalated to a wildfire. This happened to me this week and it was a total shock. It caused me to step back a bit from an until now safe group of people.
If, like me you are dependent on social media for your business, this can be tough to manage. While it's not my life-blood for the business, it is a significant part of my marketing efforts. My trick is to do what needs to be done, learn what I need, and then pop in a couple of times a day to see what's going on, and if there is anything to which I need to attend. Falling into a dark hole of shared posts, videos and rants is just asking for trouble.
You have the control of how you receive your messages and news. Take it back.
2. Choose Who You Have In Your Life
Online and offline, we can choose who we have in our lives. Choose those who reflect the energy you want to absorb. This last few months, I have had to make some hard decisions - online, I have unfriended a couple of people (who, in all honestly, were very distant acquaintances) and I've switched off notifications for others. Offline, I am judicious about where and with whom I spend my time. Deep connections are more important to me than ever, and I choose to be tender with myself by sharing withC those I believe will honour me.
Simplify your life by #keepingitreal with whom you want in your world, those who treasure you as much as you treasure them, who will keep you safe, and vice versa.
3. Be Grateful - Every Day.
Give thanks everyday for what you have, who you love, what you experience. When you begin to feel unsafe* in some way with whatever is going on, focusing on the positive by being grateful minimises the impact of the negative. It becomes a habit to greet negativity with positivity.
My daily gratitude journal has a positive impact on my life in many ways - less stress, more appreciation, more love and compassion. It has given me peace of mind and a better quality of life.
4. Don't Do Drama
Hands up - I'm a recovered drama queen! Mountains have been constructed from molehills ever since my childhood. It was a way for me to get attention - if I couldn't get positive attention, negative would do nicely, thank you.
Be pragmatic. Where does it come on the Scale of Awfulness? Is it really so bad or is it an inconvenient few minutes you're milking? Asking clear questions to understand where the drama comes from allows us to detach from the event and the emotion, and feel our own calm. Calm is safe.
Choose how you respond.
5. What's This Really About?
If someone in your life responds in a way that makes you feel emotionally unsafe, ask yourself what this is really about. It is almost certainly not about you. By understanding this, you can detach from their drama (see point 4), allow them to take personal responsibility for their own emotions, (and you take responsibility for yours), and begin to find peace and certainty in that this is not your battle to fight.
I used these 5 steps last week and I was able to regain a level of peace and calm relatively quickly through a tumultuous week.
This week I am going to spread nothing but love every single day! Just doing my bit to make the world a better place. Join me over in my private Facebook group to get your share.
Peace out, lovelies!
*I'm referring to emotional safety in this post. Physical safety is quite another realm and requires a different approach entirely. Seek appropriate help and advice.
PS - I'm doing a webinar Wed Nov 16th at 6.00pm UK / 7.00pm Paris / 1.00pm NY / 10.00am LA. It's about the 5 shifts you need to find the freedom and fulfilment in your life and business that you're craving (I know - I see you!) Sign up today.